I wish I could update you on this large jump we took on the wait list, but instead I will share with you a poem that some dear friends of mine shared with me. February will mark the 2 year anniversary of signing our contract with AGCI. Maia was only 10 months old when we decided to obey God's call to expand our family through adoption. She will be 3 this April. It is crazy when I think of all that has happened in our lives while we have been praying, and waiting for Josiah (Yes that is his name). We have just started calling him by name. We still may decide to use his Ethiopian name, but I am pretty sure we will change it to Josiah and use his Ethiopian name as his middle name. Anyways, that is beside the point. I think of Josiah everyday. I dream about him. We pray for him everyday. Even the girls will talk about him like he is already a part of our family. What a great day that will be when we see his face for the first time.
While the wait is hard, I wanted to share a poem that some dear friends of mine shared with me. It has really brought this into perspective. I have felt all of these emotions more than once during this wait.
By Russel Kelfer
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quielty, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate...
and the Master so gently said, "Wait."
"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.
My future and all to which I can relate
hangs in the balance and you tell me to Wait?
I'm needing a 'Yes', a go ahead sign.
Or even a 'No', to which I'll resign.
You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
as my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
and I grumbled to God, "So I'm waiting...for what?"
Then He seemed to kneel, and His eyes met with mine...
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause the mountians to run.
I could give you all that you seek and pleased would you be.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint.
You'd not know the power I give to the faint.
You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
when darkeness and silence are all that you see.
You'd never experience the fullness of love
when the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and that I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort late into the night,
the faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask.
From an infinate God who makes what you have last.
You'd never know should your pain quickly flee,
what it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
but oh, the loss if I lost what I'm doing in you.
So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
that the greastest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft my answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still "Wait."